i went to florida to visit this girl i know. i don't really need to explain it i dont' think. i've met her before, she's an online friend, although more of an online friends of one of my real life friends.

anyway, i hate florida. i went for two weeks because before i got my tickets i couldn't figure out another place to go. she's driving me so fucking crazy. luckily i'm leaving on monday but it's not soon enough. i want to go home and move to seattle SO bad, i can't stand it. and i've been crying a lot lately.

there are so many things that get on my nerves about her. she's like a cross between someones overly conserned mom and a 12 year old. when i watch movies with her she says "aww" way too much and giggles way too much (she giggles at everything, and i don't just mean movies). like during gattica she kept awwing and giggling... who the FUCK does that to that movie?? she doesn't understand sarcasm, even when it's very obvious and everyone else understands. she's also a VERY bad driver and very bad at directions. even when i drove she couldn't properly tell me where i was supposed to go. and she would get so mad when i would raise my voice at her.

on tuesday we left florida to drive to new york to see desaparecidos. we also picked up this guy we knew in north carolina. when we got to new york we spent about two hours looking for the venue and eventually gave up. i called my friend erik in boston to ask him if we could stay up there. he said yes, so we drove up there and didn't get there until like 5am.

a good example of how much she sucks at driving happened on the way to boston. she got pulled over. i was asleep at the time, but at some point i woke up. apparently when she was getting pulled over she tried to pull over into the median!!!!!!!! i thought everyone knew you always pull over to the right sholder. i didn't even take drivers ed or have a drivers instructor and i kick her ass so bad at driving.

anyway, my friend erik and i are REALLY good friends. i love him to death. i don't like him as more than a friend or anything like that, but i do think he's insanely attractive. anyway, the day we were there darcy and the other guy went to this thing erik's exgirlfriend was having at her house because my friend jon was visiting her, darcy used to like jon and can't get over him. she even has these "kiss kiss bears" that jon gave her for valentines day when she came out to california and she calls them "jon and darcy" and she even brought them with her!

that night while they went there i stayed with erik because i wanted to spend some time with him and i wanted to get away from darcy. later that night erik and i made out. blahblah... darcy, erik, and i had to sleep in the same bed. in the morning/afternoon erik had jumpped out of bed and went somewhere then about two seconds later darcy got up. i just laid there. after i bit i started to wonder where they are. so i walked around the house but i couldn't find them. and because i'm not an idiot i thought "oh my god, what if they're making out? i'll be so fucking mad." so eventually erik came back, he had been in his mom's room watching tv. then darcy came in his room about 5 minutes later and i asked her where she was.

"oh i was in the bathroom putting on this bandana"
"it took you 30 minutes to put on a bandana?"

i had also been in both bathrooms she would've used and in almost all the rooms. i didn't go in his mom's room though because i thought she might be sleeping and since i've lost track of days i didn't think she would've been working. anyway i kept questioning her and sometimes i would look at her with a face that was basically me continuing to ask. she kept giggling and biting her lip in this disurbingly "hi i'm an idiot and a very bad liar" way.

erik went to go take a shower and i told darcy i would be right back. so i went downstairs and asked him if he made out with her and he said no. then a few minutes later, after his mom told him something, he said we had to leave around 4. so i went up to tell darcy and she said...

"i know, he told me............... he's a really good kisser"
"oh. is the car unlocked? i want to get some clothes"

then i walked away. after i changed i went over to darcy and asked her if she was supposed to tell me about them making out (he and i didn't tell her and weren't going to tell anyone, except i HAD to tell one person... and obviously i'm telling a bunch of people now). she said she didn't know and acted really stupid. then erik came out of the shower and went upstairs. so about one second later i told darcy "be right back" and i walked up the stairs and into his room. then i asked him if had made out with her and i think he denyed it again and i said something along the lines of "oh... well she told me you did" then he said he was sorry and that he did. but he said it was all her. he didn't even know she got up after him. she followed him in the room, sat next to him, moved a little closer, and then started kissing him. he said he didn't know what to do cause he hadn't been in that sort of situation before and he was afraid he would hurt her feelings or something. and i KNOW it sounds like bullshit and i knew at the time. but either he is amazingly good at making it sound believable or it's the truth. and considering that we're good friends and he probably knows if he was lying i would find out the truth eventually he wouldn't lie. anyway, i was having a very hard time saying anything. so he took me into the bathroom so we could talk. i started crying a lot.. he hugged me and stuff. also something that makes it more believable would be because we had talked about her that night, when he and i were hanging out. and we both talked about how we didn't like her hair and he thought she looked a lot different than in her pictures, and he didn't think she was attractive but maybe she would be if he hair was different. it sounds fucked because all i mentioned was stuff about her looks, but there was a bit more too it. and i think that would be the only reason for him to make out with her, say if she was atractive to him. because they don't even know eachother at all. she thinks she knows him though for some reason, just because i've talked to her about him, she's talked to him online ONCE, and they "talked after i fell asleep" that night. that's something that bothers me a lot... the fact that she doesn't even know him and she had the fucking nerve to do that. i had told him how she had been acting to me questioning her and when she told me about them making out. he called her an idiot and a ditz and stuff. then a little later he talked to her and told her not to mention it to me again because i was hurt by it, and she didn't even understand that i was. i would think that it would at least be pretty obvious by my reactions to it...just walking away and saying things totally unrealated to it (like when she told me).

i've lost my train of thought. but anyway, when we left i cried too when i hugged him goodbye and i couldn't stop crying for about 2 hours because of all of it. then i cried later that night when i told someone about it, then i cried like 10 minutes ago because i'm thinking about it. it sucks, i've been crying way too much.

i want to stab her in the head. i hope she dies.

there have been good parts to most of this, but the bad stuff is just so horrible to me. #($*@#$)(#)$(%4#(%*#$*%)#$(

edited to add that he didn't want to tell me right away because he thought i wouldn't be so let down if he told me when i got back home. and he didn't want things to be awkward for me when i had to drive back to florida with her.

[ July 27, 2002: Message edited by: k r i s t i n ]