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Author Topic: death of those close
Walter Sobchek

Member # 37

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posted April 22, 2002 20:31      Profile for Walter Sobchek   Author's Homepage   Email Walter Sobchek   Send New Private Message      Edit/Delete Post  Reply With Quote 
i dunno. i just wanted to put this out. my grandfather is on his last legs. they say he'll probably go this week. it's not the biggest deal i guess. the family has known it was coming for a long time. he's been in the nursing home for 3 years 1 month and going through kemo-dialosis (sp?) for almost all that time. they say the avg person lasts no more than 2 years in that, which says something about my grandpa.

my grandma is a sweet lady, even if she still can't adjust to the late 20th century. i get scared more for what she'll do when he's gone, not about him actually dying. i don't want her going crazy or anything. they've been married for 51+ years. even this whole time of him in the nursing home, she's been there pretty much every day at his side, up until this latest hospital entry. dammit.

i'm a few weeks from 22, and this is the first grandparent i'm in danger of losing. its weird. i've had it lucky i guess. the other day, i was at my parents house for dinner, and we were talking about it. nobody was really upset, but i brought up my grandma. my mom told me stop over to her house and talk. i did, telling myself it would be good. well, i lost it when i got inside for some strange reason. she was actually fine, and talking normal to me. maybe i was worried about nothing. she's a religious lady, so maybe she finally got comfort. i've lost a lot of my reliigious structure in the past 5 years. but this time makes me wonder about things in general. i dunno. even if everyone knows it's coming, it still has a huge impact on all involved. sorry for writing so much. i wanted to let some out to other people. i wonder what i'll gain from this, and what else i could lose. 2 weeks before my birthday, 4 weeks before graduation. but that doesn't even matter....

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dude...dude. You're being very un-dude. Nothing is fucked here. Nothing is fucked. They're all a bunch of FUCKIN AMATUERS!


Posts: 237 | From: SmAlbany, NY | Registered: Oct 2001  |  IP: Logged
Wasting Too Much Time

Member # 19

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posted April 22, 2002 21:04      Profile for Wasting Too Much Time   Author's Homepage   Email Wasting Too Much Time   Send New Private Message      Edit/Delete Post  Reply With Quote 
i'm really sorry and what not.

my grandpa died of cancer too. it was quite a few years ago, and i was a bit too young to really understand everything. but, it hurt none the less. my grandma was in the same situation, but everything seemed to work itself out.

a few months ago another close relative died as well. it was very unexpected and he was about my dad's age. i was really devistated when it happened, and i still don't think it has quite sunk in yet, i dunno. either way, when people who are close die, its really sad and yeah.

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you could say i do at least.


Posts: 284 | From: Alberta, Canada | Registered: Oct 2001  |  IP: Logged
Clobber

Member # 38

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posted April 23, 2002 12:53      Profile for Clobber     Send New Private Message      Edit/Delete Post  Reply With Quote 
Don't be sorry for writing too much...its better to talk (or type) about it rather than to keep it inside i guess.

I have been pretty lucky as well. I have only lost one grandparent and that was when i was young. I hardly even remember him....the only thing i remember is him being at my house, and he was trying to walk up a flight of stairs..i tried to help him...the next thing i remember is him being at the bottom...he had fallen... To this day i always think that maybe it was my fault. Perhaps i should have just let him get up the stairs on his own...

But yes...i am sorry to hear about your grandfather...make sure you visit him..
And of course your grandmother will feel lonely at first..so visit her too...and have some more of those talks with her...

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Sink it


Posts: 316 | From: Ontario, Canada | Registered: Oct 2001  |  IP: Logged
nose over tail

Member # 57

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posted April 23, 2002 13:22      Profile for nose over tail   Email nose over tail   Send New Private Message      Edit/Delete Post  Reply With Quote 
my great grandpa (whom i'm told was an amazing person) died before i was born. i've only met my grandpa once. my grandpa, on my mom's side, i didn't know much before he died. sometimes, i think i've had it lucky by not feeling as though i have lost something (but sometimes i feel unlucky as to never have really getting to know these people).

it's good to see that you're taking this all pretty well. don't stop talking to your grandma, because she will be lonely when he dies.


Posts: 304 | From: evansville | Registered: Oct 2001  |  IP: Logged

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